From Alabamastan.

by Jim Floyd

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This writer's Kol Nidre prayer;

..... May the Almighty, Blessed be He, forgive me, in advance, for violating any promise to act as if I were house-broken, or any obligation I have made toward moderate conduct. I include in this any pledge which I have made to post only temperate, panty-waist, disingenuous, scribblings.

..... From this day until this day next year may I be free from any vow made to my wife or preacher regarding self-imposed restraints. Let me keep in my mind, O Lord, that old Southern axiom, "if you can't say Jew, then it ain't true." Amen and amen!

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..... An American flag made in China is a damn Chinese flag. An American flag made in China is not an indication of one's patriotism rather it indicates the enormity of our collective idiocies.

..... An alley nigger singing the nation anthem or 'God bless America' to a rap beat is uninspiring, cultural terrorism.

..... Corporate America telling me to get to the mall and buy American is the zenith of effrontery. Corporate terrorist did the same thing to Flint Michigan that Black Tuesday did to Jewtown, only it took longer. Where was their "corporate patriotism" when they sent our jobs off-shore? 'Corporate Terrorism' remains more pervasive than any other.

..... "Hello Brother Jim, I called-in to tell you that I've been a Christian for a hundred and forty-seven years and I agree with brother Jerry. I know in my heart that if Jesus was here he would be a star quarterback on the Liberty College football team and I know what Jesus would do about them terrorist, He'd nuke them sons-of-bitches and kill they families like Rev. Falwell said!"

..... Also, Jerry Falwell said that God was mad at the queers, ACLU, and other assorted vermin. Well, well Jerry, let's see if we understand what you have said. God got mad at two queers having anal sex in San Francisco so He kills people, two thousand miles away, in New York.

..... Damn, hell fire, damn, that makes God look like a terrorist, Jerry! If I were God, I'd be mad at you, you skillet-licking, chitling-sucking, gravy-sopping mamzer! You sir, are a 'theological terrorist.' Perhaps, your terrorism is like Israeli terrorism. Don't you agree that only Israeli terrorism is "sacred terrorism?" That's what you believe, isn't it, you jangled-jawed bastard?

..... Oh, by the by, how many of you Christians had police, FBI agents etc. protecting your churches, last Sunday? None of you?, of course not, only the synagogues had armed guards, for the Shabbas. Careful folks, somebody may begin to think that the Jews are our misfortune and the reason for this terrorism.

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Bush

"We gonna smoke'um out! We gonna gitt'um on the run then we gonna catch'um!"

..... This ain't no possum hunt you dumb son-of-a-bitch.

..... And what did you say? If I'm not with you then I'm a terrorist? Are you telling me that if I am not ready to die for Israel then I am a terrorist? Yes, it's about Israel, dummy.

..... Bush will not change his immigration policies, which means that wet-backs are still welcome. All the talking-head, village idiots, are calling for a tightening-up of immigration laws without stopping those nice Mexican aliens.

..... However, Arabs coming into this country should expect intensified scrutiny. Look, if you take those pictures of the Arab hi-jackers and put sombreros on'um and a little river moss hanging off they ears, begorra, they look just like yo' garden-variety Mexican. Seal the borders, now! Let's allow a few Whites in, for a change.

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..... There is a silver lining, yes, something good came out of this horror! Bless God and General Lee, E.D., a dirtroad whore on Fox and Friends pulled her dress down and her blouse up around her neck, for a whole week. Of course, she childishly regurgitates standard Jew blatherings, at least, she dressed modestly, for a whole week. But alas, a fortnight later, we are back to lots of cleavage and her dress is slowly climbing arseward.

..... After an hundred days of endless Chandra Levy reports, it took a national catastrophe to get the conversation and E.D.'s mind off the head of Gary Condit's penis.

..... Next we gonna talk about O'Lie'ly, but shalom for now.

James Floyd

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